4 Common Myths About Online Dating Pictures

If you're new to online dating you may find yourself wondering what type of profile pictures you should use for your dating profile. We often see many mistakes made such as having all group pictures, all solo pictures, or even pictures that don't reflect you in a positive light.

That said there's some common myths about online dating pictures were going to dispell for you today.

1. You Should Always Smile

Alot of people think you should look into the camera and smile. In social situations you should make eye contact, it's not always best to do with the camera. Also, for both men and women it can also be nice to sometimes just have a casual look and a casual stance vs cheesing for the camera. For men I think its more important to smile than women. Women can be worried about meeting a strange man, it's a vulnerable situation to be in and smiling can be a way of putting someone at ease, showingthem your friendly, etc.

2. Guys Should Keep Shirts On

Online dating is about playing to your strengths, if you got a nice body show it off right. Many women say right out in their profile don't bother messaging me if you have a shirtless pic on your profile. It's ironic that many of these same women saying this have bikini shots or all 45 degree angles looking down on their cleavage shots but god forbid a guy show off his abs.

First things first make sure yo have a body worth showing off. You may turn some women off to your profile or some may think your superficial but you'll also probably get a lot of messages.

3. Don't Do The Myspace Shot

Not sure why it's referred to as the Myspace shot, your guess is as good as mine, probably because myspace was the first popular social network where peopel posted pictures and many women's pictures were the 45 degree angle down the shirt pic at cleavage.

Not sure why this angle is so popular. I used to think it was because you got a shot of the girls cleavage, then I thought it was because it made women look less heavy. I now think it's actually a pretty good angle, generally better than the straight on picture so though it's cliche and I'll comment on all 45 degree angle pics on a profile, I still think it's one of the best angles for a pic.

4. Make Sure Your Face Is Showing

Obviously you don't want to intentionally cut off your face. People want to see what you look like and it seems like your unsure of yourself or hiding if your not willing to show your face. Majority of your photos should show your face but if you want to post a pic of you in a motorcycle helmet, scuba gear, whatever your hobby is go right ahead and post one.

i agreed to meet a guy i met online, now im having second thoughts?

im 22 and i tried an online dating site. i met a guy and enjoyed talking with him. aftera couple days he suggested we meet sometime. i said sure.
now im having second thoughts. i made this account not even a week ago and didnt expect to meet anyone or get asked out. im 22 and ive never been asked out or kissed or anything and i jsut dont know if this is how i would want to go about my first date. im mad at myself for agreeing because i dont want to bail on him, i just dont know the best way about turning him down, whether i say something to him or just stop responding. im seriously debating deleting my account soon
i also dont think im that physically attracted to him as shallow at tht is


Okay, I'm a big fan of online dating and have a lot of experience on there so let me offer you some advice. First off if you don't want to meet someone why did you go on an online dating website? Your essentially leading everyone on who you talk to if you don't plan on meeting.

I think you woultimee to meet someone and did want to meet someone but your inexperience dating is making you self concious and worried.

Your 22, it's time you get out and start dating, start meeting people. I know it can be nervous but just go and have fun. Go somewhere public for safety. Maybe do something where there's an activity so it's not just nervous chat or staring at each other. Maybe corny but I'm thinking miniature golf or go play pool or something where there's an activity to distract as opposed to just sitting at a bar with nothing to do but stare at each other and talk. That was ust the activity will create conversation as well.

As for you not being physically attracted to the guy i still think you should go out with him. Maybe a good way to get rid of some of that first date nervousness. If it was a guy you were super attracted to you would be even more nervous with this guy go out, if nothing else maybe you meet a friend. Best of luck to you.

Mobile online free dating sites?

I am 19 and I go to college and I can't find a girlfriend. I started winter term and everyone else already developed friendships. I would like to know what are some online dating sites with mobile capabilities since my regular computer is in the shop.

Most all online dating sites have a mobile capability now days. There are some dating websites which are strictly mobile such as skout. The cool thing about skout is it's supposed to be location based so say your at a bar or baseball game you can see people within 0.2 miles of you a mile of you etc. Potentially you can even message people at the same event or nearby you.

The site doesn't really work out quite like that in terms of hey were both at this concert lets meetup by the beer tent but taht's the idea behind it.

In terms of free dating sites I think the two best out there are plentyoffish and okcupid. Both have wonderfully laid out online apps as well as websites. They are free and also have a large userbase who is active on the site.

What is the best way to talk to someone you have never met online without it seeming weird?

I am a 17 year old teenage guy and for some reason I can NEVER find a girl in my area that I am attracted to. It is either always some girl I have seen/met online or they live far away. I am not trying to sound self centered or arrogant but girls and guys even tell me I am very attractive all of the time and complement me, so I do get interest from a lot of people, but I just never feel anything back.

Anyways lately there is this girl who caught my eye online on some youtube video who is basically my exact definition of what my perfect girl would be both look and personality wise. I know the video may not be a perfect representation but still.... Anyways, I found out just through links on her video what her twitter, facebook, etc was and she still seemed to act the same way she was in the video, she was a girl who was actually attractive without gallons of makeup on, never once saw or read anything where she swore, etc just things like that are important to me because most teenagers morals have gone downhill.
I know it is a huge long shot since I have never met her but I was curious if anyone had any ideas of how I could try to get in contact her and just see if anything happens. I am kind of tired of having no interest in anyone in my area. I want to be in a relationship, but I don't want to be in one just to be in one. I am a pretty religious person and try to live my life the best way I can, so I view relationships as something serious even if it is just dating. I don't really believe in just dating several people just to have fun, I would like a real relationship. I personally always thought online dating and meeting someone over the internet was pointless, now it seems like my only option besides just traveling somewhere else....

 

Okay, well first off this isn't the typical type of question we answer here at allthingsonlinedating.com however I found your question interesting and wanted to give you an answer and some advice. 

Not to burst your bubble but at 17 the likeliehood of you having a relationship especially a long distance relationship with this woman is probably small. You just aren't old enough, don't have the money most likely, dont have paretns approval to be going cross country to meet some stranger you met online so I would question how far this relationship could go even if she does like you or respond to your advances. I don't see it developing beyond a penpal relationship probably for at least a few years.

I don't mean to get too psychological on you but I think part of the reason you like so much is you don't know her so you can ascribe any attributes you want to her. Also maybe how she is online is an online persona and not her real personality. I think if she were another girl you went to school with or met at the mall you woudln't think she was anything special.

All that said I suppose it can't hurt to drop her a message through youtube and just say hey I like your videos you seem cool and I thought you were cute. Leave it at that and if she wants to strike up a convo cool

Best of luck to you.

Have You Ever Seen A Friend Or Family Member While Searching An Online Dating Site?

I know some people are hesitant to put a picture up on their online dating profile for fear that a friend, family member, or co-worker will see them on there while searching themselves. This is a pretty commonly asked question and to be quite honest it's actually something I've wondered about mysel f. I have not found any friends of family members while searching dating sites despite knowing that I have friends who are on dating sites so I think it's unlikely.

My advice don't be worried about this or embarressed about being on an online dating website. Online dating does not have the stigma associated with it that it did years ago, it's actually very mainstream and a very normal way of meeting people, especially with our hectic lives and for those who are tired of the bar scene.

Also, something else to consider. For someone to find your profile they themselves have to be participating in online dating as well so why be embarressed the know you are on an online dating site when they themselves are on there.

I'll admit, despite not being shy or embarressed about participating in online dating I probably still wouldn't be thrilled to have a coworker tell me hey saw you on Plenty Of Fish, that said it woudn't stop me from being on the site or posting a picture

I often see people wanting to setup a profile and leave a picture off their profile. Just my opinion but I think most others would agree you may as well not even be on there if you don't have a picture. Most people when searching click the filter for "only profiles with pictures" so your profile won't be seen and even if it is people probably won't message you. Let's be honest attraction is an important part of beginning a relationship and you are leaving that part out entirely. In addition to that someone who doesn't have a picture seems to be hiding something, do they have a significant other they dont want stumbling upon their profile?

What are your thoughts? Have you ever seen a friend, co-worker or friend on an onlien dating site or have they ever commented to you they found you on there?

Why do some black women get mad when black men dates a different race?

Personally I think it's close minded for anyone to think it's a negative for two people to get together just because of race or skin color. Don't confuse that however with people having a preference.

Personally I am attracted to white women, hispanic women and indian women. I'm not as attracted to back women in general. I wouldn't rule out dating a black women but black women are just not someone I tend to be attracted to. There's nothing racist about that it's personal preference.

On the other hand if I think it's wrongn for a black women and a white man to date that is racist and really it's none of my business.

As for your question, your generalizing and it's not fair to say all black women feel that way. I have heard that stereotype myself as welll though so we will address it according to what I've heard black women say. Black women often say a good black man who treats them well, is employed, etc is hard to find and because of that they get mad when their "relatively small pool of men" as some of them may think of it, is taken by a white women, hispanic women, asian women, etc.

How do I tell someone I have recently started dating that I used to cut myself?

Personally I would say this isn't something you would share with someone you just started dating. It's not that you want to hide anything or lie about who you are but when we first start dating we put our best foot forward, in western society its just not a cultural norm to share too much too soon.

I would wait until it starts getting more serious but not too serious. Bring it up then and he either accepts you or it changes his view of you. I do admire your courage to be upfront and know who you are but it's like telling someone you just met all your personal business, its just not something you want to do. Wait until they see the positive things about you before you start letting the deeper things come out.

Boyfriend is still active on dating site?

So my boyfriend and I met on this dating site about a month and a half ago, and since then things have been going great. I actually hadn't signed back onto mine since we started talking/going out, until today when I randomly decided that I was going to close my account down since I honestly didn't see a reason to keep it open anymore. But that was when I noticed that he still had his open, and apparently was still active, he'd been on it the day before. Now this bothers me for a number of reasons. We're exclusive, we have each other's relationship statuses displayed on our Facebooks, we've met the majority of each others' friends, he's introduced me to all of the people that he works with and talks about me a lot, and I'm meeting his family this weekend. (They're from out of state and are coming down to visit.) He doesn't seem like the type to cheat or screw around and if he's telling all of these people who are important to him about me then I doubt he would have someone else on the side. But it still is a red flag to me and I don't know how to bring it up without sounding like a crazy stalker! I'd like for us both to close our accounts since we're exclusive, but again, I don't know how to ask this.

This is one of the tricky and awkward parts about online dating. You can see when someone else logged in. I always felt awkward going back on the dating site after I had a good date with someone and I have to admit being on the other end it does sting if you have a great date and then see the other person logged on an hour after. 

That said it sounds like you two had a discussion and were exclusive so this is definately wrong. You definately need to call him out on it. I don't mean but it sounds like maybe he likes you and likes having you around but is still seeking someone else and may leave you when he finds them.

You definately need to call him out on this and see what he says and go from there. I wish you the best of luck you sound like a lovely young lady.

Ladies! Do you really go for personality or looks?

Women go for a combination of both looks and personality. Obviously there has to be some level of attraction but women are much more emotional and mental where as men are more visual. Women will look for humor and a good personality just as much if not more so than looks. That said you can't lable all women. Some women are very deep and open and other women are superficial.

How to freshen up after a break up?

Recently I've broken up with my boyfriend. Our relationship was nothing too serious, but still I felt bad after our problems. However, I realised that feeling sorry for myself is the worst thing I can do. What are some good ideas for having fun after such a period? I want to meet new people, have sex, feel "relationship - free". I don't have all the free time in the world, so I can go out probably only on friday or saturday night. Any personal experience? What would you do if you were in my place? :)

Breakups are tough even if the relationship wasn't that serious. Don't wallow in self pitty and don't get into a rut. There are positive things about being single, doing what you want when you want. Spending more time with friends. Knowing your free to find someone who truly is a great fit for you. Focus on the good stuff and not on the negative stuff.

In terms of what to do. If you enjoy going out go out. Maybe try out an online dating group. Join a meetup group for some activity or interest you have. Start working out, just getting the blood flowing makes you feel better and more positive.

Is it weird that I want to date a deaf guy?

I don't know why, but I want to date a guy with some sort of disability (like deafness.) I always hear and see people say that they could never date a guy like that. So, is it weird that I want it?

I don't think dating a deaf guy is wierd. If you fall in love with someone you fall in love with them regardless of deafness, muteness, hair color, etc. That said it is a bit wierd if you are actively seeking out a deaf guy. Is it some strange fetish or curiousity you have? Do you want someone you don't have to talk to? etc.

What does it mean when a girl says its getting too serious and she needs a breather?

I would say under very few circumstances does that mean anything good. Sure there are some women who are very busy with their careers, maybe need to find themselves, have children, or just got out of a relationship and want to get some balance in their lives before moving forward full steem ahead. It does happen and it is understandable, however I would say majority of the time it's a nice way of saying she's not happy in the relationship and wants to breakup.

Is it ok to look thru my bf's phone?

No, it's not okay to go through your boyfriends phone or for a boyfriend to go through a girlfriends phone. If you have trust issues work on them, if you have something you want to know ask them. I personally don't ever consider it okay to invade someone's privacy and go through their phone. If you do this the trust isn't there and the relationship is doomed anyways regardless of what you find good or bad.

Some may argue that if you have evidence something is up and your significant other denies and won't talk to you about it maybe you have no other option but I don't even think it's good or okay to invade someone's privacy.

ATTRACTIVE PEOPLE ONLINE DATING?

I am a male model, and when I send people messages on online dating websites no one ever responds. I don't understand. I posted pictures on rating sites and nearly everyone rated me between a 9.5 and a 10. But no one seems to message me back on dating sites. Whats the deal? I'm too shy to approach women in public, and if a women strikes up a convo with me, I never ask for her number. What am I to do?

Well first off there's more to attraction and dating than looks so does your profile also tell what kind of person you are, show your interests, etc? 

If so then I would assume one of two things. People may think your a fake profile or a fake picture. Do you have lots of pictures up? If you have one really attractive picture people will think your fake so post multiple pictures in different settings. 

One other thing I can think of is people are often intimidated by attractive people, some women may think you are out of their league.

Good online dating sites that you could recommend? OKCupid & Plenty Of Fish

Two online dating websites I would recommend are OKCupid.Com and PlentyOfFish.Com or POF.Com.

Many people knock free sites as having people who aren't serious or not being as good as pay sites. I suppose that's true to a certain extent, however I have met lots of greatpeople on both those sites. Sure if it's free maybe people are a little less invested in the process, may setup a profile and never use it and things like that but it's a good way to try out online dating and get your feet wet without having to pay.

What are some good things to put in an online dating profile?

Be honest, if you start out being fake or being soeone you aren't you will have to continue that charade and who wants to do that? I know personally I want to find someone who accepts me for being me and allows me to be me.

For example, I oftne think party girls and girls who like clubbing and bar hopping are attractive so at times I would try to put up that front even though I personally would rather stay at home. First off many will see through me sinc that's not really my personality but even if it does land me a date who cares because now all my weekends are going to be spent clubbing with this girl...something I hate, as opposed to finding someone like myself who'd like to stay in cook dinner have a few drinks and watch a movie.

Should I stay offline after a date?

I met a guy on an online dating site. We went on one date so far and text everyday. We have been talking for about 5 days. Went On the first date 2 days ago. I like this guy and there could be something there. Now my question is should I not go online to the dating site we met on? It shows when you are and were last online. I went on my friends and saw that he was online today. What does that mean and is this bad? Sorry it's so long, any help is greatly appreciated.

I also find this kind of an awkward and tricky aspect of online dating. On one hand after one date your not off the market, you aren't exclusive and you are not in a committed relationship so there's no reason to take down your profile or not go on the site.

At the same time however it does kind of sting when you have a great date and then see the person you went on the date with was on the online dating site an hour after they got home from your date. I also feel awkward on the flip side going on the dating site after I have a great date with someone. I feel like I'm doing something wrong even though I am not. I kind of dislike how dating sites show your last login for this very reason. On some sites like OKCupid you can hide your login but then you lose the abilitiy to see other daters last login as well.

For this reason I think communication is very important. Communicate your wants and needs and expectations for a relationship and don't assume your exclusive until you have the talk and agree to be. Also just a nice message I wish all would follow, treat others how you would like to be treated and remember people have feelings.

Why are all the guys who like me shorter than me?

I'm a 6'0 girl who's finding dates through an online dating site. I've specifically requested that no guy shorter than me ask me out. About 20 or so guys have already asked me out and they've all been around 5'9-5'11, and it's getting annoying. Why aren't the guys taller than me asking me out? Why do I look unattractive to them? Don't get me wrong. I'm fine if he's short, just as long as he's not shorter than me.

Well your quite tall, probably taller than the average guy so by refusing to date anyone shorter than you, you hvae to accept the fact you are really limiting yourself in potential dates. Also, you may be missing out on some great catches and great people by refusing to date people shorter than you.

As for you being fine if he's short just not shorter than you. You are tall even by guy standards so nobody shorter than you will be short, they will be above average in height.

Are you not dating shorter guys because you aren't attracted to them, or because you feel awkward wearing heels next to a short guy? If it's the latter get over your insecurity and go meet some great guys...even if they are shorter than you.

Online dating: When it appropriate to go to a guy's place?

I met a man on an online dating site 2 weeks ago today after talking online and on the phone everyday for 2 weeks. First date went well and we want to see each other again. We have been talking either on the phone or on skype everyday. He wants me to come over soon but I'm not sure if it would be right? He said that he likes to stay at home so what should I do?

I have a lot of experience online dating. I have had dates come over to my home within hours of talking to me while others we wait weeks if not even months if the dates are not frequent. 

Let's be honest come to my house basically means he wants to hook up with you. Are you ready for that and intrested in that?

One side note. Personally I am a homebody and enjoy staying in as well. Having someone over, cooking some dinner, having a few drinks, etc. I can see this also being an honest preference in terms of activities as well. 

Obviously it's somewhat forward to ask someone to come over for a first date but once you've been out maybe three times I woud say it's appropriate to invite someone over, it's up to the women whether she's comfortable comming over.

Is Online dating a good way of meeting people considering?

1- Would an attractive, successful and socially active man or woman turn to the internet to find love unless they have huge issues?

Yes, the stigma attached to online dating is pretty much over with, online dating is very mainstream now days. Online dating doesn't mean someone is desperate or pathetic or has issues. People are busy, maybe they don't work in an environment condusive to meeting people. Maybe the bar scene isn't their thing. Typically people meet others through work, school, friends but someone with a busy lifestyle may not have time for all that. There are definately attractive people with their lives together on online dating sites.




2- Isn’t’ much conceivable that these people would be able to easily find love through other means such as work and social settings?

Personally I work in an office with two other people both much older than myself. My previous job was an internet startup with nothing but attractive twenty somethings and I loved it but at my current job not much chance of finding love. Also many would argue work is a bad place to start relationships if you value your career.

In terms of social scene as you get into your mid and late twenties friends get busy with lives, career, family, friends move away. It's not like you have that giant social circle you did in college. Also, unlike meeting someone through friends or work where your basically going off appearance most onnline dating sites actually let you get a peek at someones interests, personality, etc. 


3- Isn’t obvious that online dating sites have become attraction point for weirdoes, desperate and those who find it easier to deceive others?

Are there players and con artists out there...yes there are but so those same people are at your work, at the grocery store and at bars. Online dating is no different from regular dating you have the same segment of the population online as you do in the real world.


4- Why would an attractive girl shamelessly and degradingly put herself on offer for, real life stalkers, scammers, and such an audience?

As opposed to an attractive girl shamelessly flaunting herself at the bars waiting for stalkers and rapists? I would actually argue you probably get a better calibur of person online than out at a bar or club.